Lindy focus part 2 - 5 mistakes CAN be made in 5 minutes - a case of a mistakes chain

bloody hell, I'm a bloody mess. minuse the blood thank god. I am really good at pissing people off.
All during while I'm trying to be the best person I can possibly be.


making 5 mistakes in 5 minutes:

first and upmost important rule of all times dancing, and socialising, and everything as a matter of fact: 1. NEVER DANCE WHEN YOU ARE TIRED!!!!!
I learned that a few years back when I twisted my ankle. I was tired it was 2 am at the regular dance place at my home town of Tel-Aviv, this guy I haven't danced with in the longest time asks me to dance, I tell him I am dead, but he asks me to try anyway with a big smile.  I grant him a big smile back and accept the dance. and yes, I twist my anckle. he asks me if I'm ok, I'm not quite sure but I never let anyone worry about me, and I say "I'm fine, I'll dance it off", I regret it the second I step on that foot again and sit on the floor at the edge of the dance floor with pain. that incident didn't take me off the dance floor, a week later I came back to dancing, which was an even poorer decision because than I actually sprang My ankle and thus instead of being incapacitated for two weeks of non dancing I ended up with 3 months of this crap. (pardon my french)

fast faeward 3 years later. we arrive to today and I am @ Lindy focus late night lindy floor room (woohooo!)
It is 3 am and someone I don't know asks me to dance after I've taken off my shoes. I tell him I am tired and that he can find me at the same place the next song. he doesn't show up at the next song. So I ask someone I saw dancing and quite liked his fun looking moves. I ask him, but then I remember I promised the dance to that first guy who asked me, and was thinking what if he sees me and thinks, "oh, she didn't wanna dance with me, but with that guy so she said this and that to get rid of me."
So, 2nd mistake: instead of dancing with the guy I asked to dance, and finding that other guy later I make this guy wait while I try to find the first one. I can't find him and its a nice song and a patient guy waiting for me to snap out of it and dance with him. what a waist! we only danced for 30 seconds of that song :/
I'm about to tell him we must dance the next song too. But than the first one shows up!
I make yet another mistake and dance with the first guy now (even though he totally disappeared before, so maybe I shouldn't have given him the credit).
I thank him for the dance and get back to the 2nd guy.

I keep making stupid mistakes (numb 3 now but who's counting):
Horrified by missing the opportunity to ask a question I have waited so long to ask Andy Rid, seeing he was available at the moment, knowing I will probably never see him again, with this being my last big event in the states before I go back to Israel, I ask the 2nd guy if it's OK that I ask Andy a quick question.
Andy ends up explaining my question  to me very thoroughly and truthfully, so nice, and then asks me to dance (!) I SAY NO, because "I promised this other guy a dance now".
I missed out dancing with Andy read. and I don't catch him later, or the next days. I'll be going back to Israel without having that pleasure. :0( sigh

Finally I dance with the 2nd guy. During the dance I feel he lost his will to dance with me. since I kept him hanging this long (I must be a horrible person) so we have a dance, I dance horribly thinking of all these things, and by the end of the dance I also get my leg twisted (yey me! I'm so good at this). I don't think he would apreciate the dance, man, I didn't  even like myself, why would he?
horrible horrible horrible
my friends, by the way, told me I should have danced with Andy as soon as he asked. I couldn't do that to that nice guy. was I wrong to say NO to a superstar?

It's a new day tomorrow. maybe  I'll be a better person than.
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Next post is about how NOT to say no to a dance. (from an experienced perspective of a declined dancer)

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update:
here is what the 2nd lead wrote commenting on a post on Facebook:
I can empathize with you Madeline. I had a very weird encounter last night as well. As I was sitting out when a girl asks me to dance. I accepted, but she proceeds to tell me that she already promised the dance to someone else. However, mystery man was no where to be found. We danced the remaining 30 seconds of the song, and I asked if she wanted to dance the next one. Mystery man was found, and I waited until the next song. I found her again and we got a new spot on the dance floor. As the song starts, she says to me, "I have to ask this guy a question." This person being Andy Reid. She left me and talked Andy for the rest of the song. I stood around for awhile, but I found my seat again to take a break. After her conversation she asked me to dance again. I agreed, but was not enthralled about the situation. I guess my suggestion would be, take these encounters with a grain of salt. If someone does't want to dance you then, 
whatever...They probably are not the kind of person you would want to surround yourself with.


Told you he probably will never know and wouldn't appreciate it.

sigh

How long have you been dancing?

Dear dancers,
How do you answer that question:
**** how long have you been dancing? ****

Sometimes people ask me that,
 right on the dance floor,
 after they have asked me to dance.

Once so happens, I answered: "not too long"
& my lead immediately moved us off the dance floor,
to explain to me the basic 6 count. (I was quite familiar with it, tnx) but enthralled with his enthusiasm, I listened carefully and followed his movements.
Who knows what I might learn? ^_^

At the end of my tiny lesson I thanked him for his attention and let him be,
as a friend just asked me to dance.
I danced with my friend for a while & at that point I saw the guy put a hand on his mouth,
telling his friend: "oh sh*t she's a real dancer!"
 I smiled to him, apologetically for the misleading. (What's a 'real' dancer anyway?)

I don't know if "not too long" was the right answer to his question, 
but I was tired of listing numbers after a while.
over time, I've also tried the vague answer of "a while" which apparently sounds patronizing to some, So I don't use it that often.

 I didn't encounter with that question on the dance floor for a long time now. 
Not until yesterday, when a beginner blues dancer asked me to dance.
    I wanted to answer : "does it matter?"  or "Why don't we just dance and see",  Not deciding what to say I eventually shrugged and we had a cute little dance.


when asked on the dance floor, I feel a bit discouraged by the question,
So, it made me think of some answers again
- If I answer: "oh, so and so years, I feel I'm being tested, evaluated as we do start dancing, I don't feel as free to do my usual shenanigans.
- If I answer vaguely it's not always welcomed as a joke.
- If I say I 'just started'...well :) it's either "you're pretty good for a beginner" or "you should do this more often" up to the reoccurring case of dance floor teaching..

I feel it changes expectations of the dance before the real dance, and why would you do that? why would you want to predetermine how good a dance would feel, based on a silly question instead of just trying it out?
I don't know about you, I always want to be SURPRISED FOR THE BEST.
Please don't take that away from me.

two pointers: 
                   1.   When asked on the dance floor,  it always seems to me like you are new to this.
                   2.   It's a misleading question. The people who ask it are cheating into trying to find out: "well, how good are you?" before starting to dance. For me it's the equivalent of not starting a Lindy hop dance with a pulse - Just throwing a swing-out out of nowhere Or talking English in an all Spanish class, It's just a different language, out of place.

Something else: It's not about how many years you've been dancing.
I have danced with people who have been dancing for a little shy of a year , who dance better than Most of the people on the dance floor and people 
who have been dancing for 10 years
that can rip your arms out and vice verse.

Maybe a little advice for people who are prone to do that,
I try to assume each dancer I don't know in advance is the best dancer in the world. And you know what, if I make them feel like they are, They give the best dance they can. Also, if I can't give 100% of myself in a dance, I probably won't dance. I don't want to give less or more.
If you ask me that question as we start to dance, your expectations of me are different. I might not be able to give that 100%..

I think the most important question people should ASK THEMSELVES instead of other people is how can I make this dance amazing regardless of how 'good' or experienced my dance partner is. 

:)

Posts about Lindy Focus - part 1

Off to the longest journey I have ever even imagined taking to a dance event - but for no other than LINDY FOCUS. The ride was supposed to take a total of 17hours, that is if there is no traffic, including 4 changes I need to make along the way, which I can tell you I’m not going to miss. How much time did the entire trip take?

December 25, 2014 - can't sleep, making more touchups to dresses I want to sell at lindy focus, they all have to be perfect. Have to make sure I'm not forgetting anything I need to take with me.

I don't sleep.

Guy Schory stayed up with me, to spend a bit more time together (such a perfect life partner <3). I won't be seeing him for a week and a half! 

I leave the house at 6 am, with a huge suitcase, a food bag and a backpack. I ran with the heavy dance artillery,cause I'm afraid of being late. Get on the T (Boston's subway) which is pleasantly empty, have half an hour to kill, and I can't wait to taste breakfast. Guy packed me so well with yummy food he made, only to realize I haven't packed a single spoon or fork (dow!). I find the tiny spoon I put in my tea canister from David's Teas (yes!), eat some and reach Alewife.

Take the bus to NY. The organizer on the bus asks who on this bus has an available seat next to them. I raise my hand with fear, but she says I am the lucky one who got it to herself, (sweet!).

But I still can't sleep with all the excitement. Wondering what if I didn't pack right and figuring that I left the white paper with travel instructions stuck to the fridge (Sh*t). Ok, no worries, when it's closer to noon I'll just give Katie a call, and she could explain how to get to NJ from Pennstation.

I dose off on the bus to wake up every half an hour or so.

I get to Penn Station anxious to go to the bathroom, and I wait in a 30 min line for it. Miss my train and wait another 30 min for the next one. It is now 12:37 pm. I'm an hour late. Can't sleep on that train either. The ride is supposed to be between 35-55 min. How much time did it take?

Katie picks me up from the train station at Edison, and feeds me with steak (another win!) after about an hour of eating and chatting with her lovely mom, we hit the road.Itis now 2:17 PM. We start the drive and since I was nervous, I drank a lot of water and combined with lack of sleep, I had to stop like a million times on the road. I tried as hard as I could to stay up for Katie, but ended up passing out 3 times for about 1-1.5 hours each time. Katie was so sweet about it, especially as she didn't have a lot of sleep herself.

We had dinner at TGI Friday’s we saw on the road. It was a Friday and we got there just before a line started piling up to having to wait 20 min to be seated. (win again! I am good at this game!) We shared a rack of BBQ Pork ribs and spinach dip, which were amazing, Katie also had coffee and said it was tasty.

The last 3 hours of the ride were the hardest, but at the last two Katie put a really awesome collection of 90's music. You have no idea how much awesomeness can come out of 2 girls singing angry Alanis Morissette songs among others in a car to stay awake, and how amazing it works! I loved our harmony. It was really cool. Katie you are one awesome friend!

also a win: only 1$ was spent on tolls, even though we were warned that it might reach up to 50$ worth of tolls. (another win!)

We got to the place sometime between 3:00-4:00 am, it'skinda blurry, I took a bath and went to bed. Woke up at 3:00 PM to start my lindy focus experience. 19 total trip hours. I can say it now, and I said it also then: TOTALLY WORTH IT! (and I'm not crazy, well.. maybe I am, but who are you to judge? If you are reading this, you are probably a lindy hopper too, so, I believe we share a craze).

Off to the longest jurney I have ever even imagined taking to a dance event - how about no other than LINDY FOCUS.  The ride is supposed to take a total of 17 hours, that is if there is no traffic, and I don't miss any part of the 4 changes I need to make along the way.

december 25 2014 - can't sleep, making more touchups to dresses I want to sell at lindy focus, they all have to be perfect. have to make sure I'm not forgetting anything I need in the suitcase.
I don't sleep.
Guy Schory stayed up with me, to spend a bit more time together (such a perfect life partner <3). I won't be seeing him for a week and a half! :/


I leave the house at 6 am, with a huge suitcase, a food bag and a backpack. run with the heavy dance artilery cause I'm afraid of being late. get on the T (Boston's subway) which is pleasently empty, have half an hour to kill: So I can't wait to taste breakfast. Guy packed me so well with Yummy food he made, only to realize I haven't packed a single spoon or fork (dow!). I find the tiny spoon I put in my tea canister from David's tea (yes!) eat some and reach alewife.

Take the bus to NY. The organizer on the bus asks: who on this bus has an available seat next to them? I raise my hand with fear, she says I am the lucky one who got it to myself, (sweet!).
But I still can't sleep with excitement. Wondering what if didn't pack right, remembering I left the white paper with travel instructions stuck to the fridge :P (Sh*t). ok, no worries, when it's is closer to noon I'll just make the call to Katie, and she could explain how to get to NJ from pan station.
I dose off on the bus to wake up every half an hour or so.

I get to Pan Station anxious to go to the bathroom. I wait in a 30 min line to the bathroom. miss my train, wait another 30 min for the next one. it is now 12:37 pm. I'm an hour late. Can't sleep on that train either. the ride is supposed to be between 35-55 min.

Katie picks me up from the train station at edison, and feeds me with steak (another win!) after about an hour of eating and chating with her lovely mom, we hit the road. it is now 2:17 PM. We start the drive and since I was nervous, I drank a lot of water and already with a lack of sleep, I had to stop like a million times on the road.I tried as hard as I could to stay up for Katie, but ended up passing out 3 times for between an 1-1.5 hours each time. Katie was so sweet about it, and didn't have a lot of sleep herself.

We had dinner at TGI fridays we saw on the road. It was a friday and we got there just before a line started pilling up to having to wait 20 min to be sitted. (win again! I am good at this game!) we shared a rack of BBQ Pork ribs and spinage dip which were amazing, katie also had coffee and said it was tasty.
The last 3 hours of the ride looked to be the hardest. but at the last two katie puled up a really awesome collection of 90's music. you have no idea how much awesomeness can come out of 2 girls singing angry Alanis Morisset songs among others in a car to stay awake, and how amazing it works! I loved our harmony. It was really cool. Katie you are one awesome bundle!
also a win: only 1$ was spent on tolls. even though we were warned that it might reach up to 50$ worth of tolls. (another win!)

We got to the place between 3:00-4:00 am, it's kinda blurry, I took a bath and went to bed. woke up at 3:00 PM to start my lindy focus experience. 19 total trip hours. I can say it now, and I said it also then: TOTALLY WORTH IT! (and I'm not crazy, well.. maybe I am, but who are you to judge? If you are reading this, you are probably a lindy hopper too, so, I believe we share a craze).